Loki_Six

"Okay, I'm not gonna kill you, but I'm going to tell you three things that will haunt you for the rest of your days: you've ruined your father, you've crippled your family, and baldness is hereditary!"

"Prayer: the last refuge of a scoundrel."

"When you choose one that's floating upside down, it somewhat defeats the purpose of selecting a live lobster."

"You can emerge now from my chips. The opportunity to prove yourself a hero has long gone."

"Maybe Lisa's right about America being the land of opportunity, and maybe Adil has a point about the machinery of capitalism being oiled with the blood of the workers."

"In case you get hungry, there's an open beer in the fridge."

"It's not quite breakfast, it's not quite lunch, but it comes with a slice of canteloupe at the end. You don't get completely what you would at breakfast, but you get a good meal."

"Uh, ma'am, what if you're a really good person but you're in a really, really, really bad fight and your leg gets gangrene and has to be amputated. Will it be waiting for you in heaven?"

We're playing,"What's that odor?" Dad's feet?

"You know, you play pretty well for someone with no real problems."